happy and hungry

living the zen life

A is for ADHD

Just thought I’d re-blog this, partly because there’s a lot of personal stuff going on in my life right now and I haven’t had time to write a new post (re-posting an old one instead is pathetic, I know, and I’m sorry), but also simply because it was my first post to this blog, and I haven’t really written much about ADHD recently. I just wanted to keep it in the circulation because it really describes how having ADHD makes me (and I guess others) feel.

I don’t know if anyone is interested anyway, but I need a bit of a boost…and at the moment I’m not getting it from anywhere else. I’m proud of this post and stand by all I said. The feedback I got on it made me feel super happy and proud so I just wanted to re-live that feeling. Please, just let me have that, with no judgments on my poor show and my laziness on the part of my blog.

I haven’t commented on anyone’s posts recently, liked anyone’s posts recently, done any of the awards that I’m so far behind on…I’m rubbish and selfish and I’m sorry. I don’t want to revert to my old ways of having no passions. That idea practically floods my brain with dread. I don’t want to revert to being a vegetable who just has no interests in life, no emotion other than hatred and anger.

I’m not going to let that happen, though. I will get back to writing properly and consistently again soon, commenting on my friends’ (I hope you’re my friends) posts…please know how much I appreciate all of your support and I love everything you write. I’ll catch up, read it all and reply to emails etc soon I promise. Just got a lot on in my head right now. It’s no excuse, but I’m just saying. To be honest you probably aren’t missing my posts or anything anyway! It’s more that I owe it to myself to keep going, and I feel shit and guilty when I don’t keep my promise to myself. My promise that I’ll be useful and continue to do what I truly love. Not be consumed by shitty thoughts. Just sometimes find it hard.

It’s my birthday tomorrow, I should be happy. I’m going to be eighteen.

I want to feel proud of my blog again, because it was the one thing that kept me going and feeling like I had something to look forward to every day.

Thanks and sorry for the lack of commitment and for this pathetic post. I’m committed I swear but struggling. Will get back to you when I can.

E. x

happy and hungry

It’s like working on a Macbook instead of a Windows PC. Everything works so fast that it actually can become counter-productive and more confusing, putting everything slightly out of focus and making everything slightly harder to comprehend. I feel a bit like a goldfish swimming round and round the same bowl everyday. Claustrophobic, hot, anxious. It’s not like I actually know how it would feel to be a goldfish, but I think I can probably make a pretty fair guess. I’ll go with the idea that I’m a little bit like the human version of a goldfish. Perhaps it’s a tad far-fetched but I find myself quite enjoying the analogy so I’m going with it.

Now that I’ve had my diagnosis, everything that ever didn’t make sense about my life now does. Of course I still question ‘why me?’, but I now fundamentally know why I’m the way I am. I sometimes wish I could…

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Berlin 2015 – cheers to petty melodrama and great friendships

Hola! So I’m back from Germnay wooooo….back to sunny old England. …Although it’s my prom on Saturday :D. I just thought I’d write a nice cheery chirpy little post for you all about my holiday. Well, specifically my friends, not... Continue Reading →

Writing for The Psychologist?

Hey guys! So I have been taking a few blogging courses here and there, primarily orientated towards Guest Blogging. Now, Guest blogging is, I believe, when one decides that one would enjoy writing a column or whatever for another blogger... Continue Reading →

Gay Pride Berlin!

Aloha! So yesterday was the COOLEST and GREATEST day EVER. I'm staying with a friend in Berlin and her dad is in the army. He's worked really hard and recently been promoted to the title of 'Brigadier'. This means he's... Continue Reading →

I know, I know, my posts have been sparse of late

Hello Chums! I'm awfully sorry for my disappearance - disgraceful I know. I was staying at my boyfriend's house, and it was perfect again. We just lolled about on the sofa watching telly, ate a ton of chocolate, went suit shopping for... Continue Reading →

Equality: Mental Health deserves the same as Health

Today I'd just like to share something pretty outrageous with you all. You may have heard, or you may have not. It's very old; Sky News posted the article 29th November 2014. However it has only just come to my attention,... Continue Reading →

Don’t do as I say or do as I do

Today was an extremely tiring day. I’ve spent it being mad at everyone within two feet of me. My head is screaming and I want to just hit, and like, hurt anyone in the vicinity. Not cool. Or nice, for... Continue Reading →

My Kindle eBook “One More Time” available now!

Hey guys just a little something for you to check out…
Paul has written an eBook. It won’t take long to read, it’s insightful and inspiring that he has put his journey into words. It only costs 99p on Amazon so he’s not exactly asking a lot of you to read his masterpiece! x

Life & All It’s Shizzle!

Ok I changed the title and for the moment it’s only about 11,500 words long but I’ve put my heart and soul into giving you a glimpse of how OCD has affected my life. I hope it gives comfort in some way.
One More Time: A Personal Battle with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder & Depression by Paul McKechnie

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My First YouTube Video?

*Ahem*. Got everyone's attention? First YouTube video is out *ahem* I'm really embarrassed, kinda feel incredibly vulnerable with my story out go give it some love! Please aha. It's called 'My Road to ADHD Diagnosis', and basically explains the... Continue Reading →

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